but I had a fight with my mom. I don't know how many of you can relate to this, but does your mom ever say something like, “Why do you have such and such issues? You shouldn't have those issues. Get over them. Stop it. Stop having issues.” Which issues, mom? Oh, you mean the ones that I got from you? Those ones? The ones that you're still dealing with? So me being insecure and a doormat as a result of years of absorption from you and the temper that I got from my dad…those traits that you guys still wear on your sleeves…I shouldn't have them, but you can hang on to them for 50 years? That's a little selfish, don't you think.
Anyway, I came down here to unwind and explained it to
whimpysmom (1:11:25 AM): yeah.
Joelandrewtyson (1:11:31 AM): haha
whimpysmom (1:11:38 AM): sorry, my mom had to come down and play, “let's get emotionally fucked up.”
Joelandrewtyson (1:11:38 AM): that was a delayed response
Joelandrewtyson (1:11:43 AM): nice
Joelandrewtyson (1:11:55 AM): thats always fun… at 1:00 am
whimpysmom (1:12:02 AM): for fucking real
whimpysmom (1:12:18 AM): i love it when someone's like, “blahblahblah i think you have issues”
whimpysmom (1:12:30 AM): and i say, “yeah, thanks, i know i have issues. i'm working on them.”
whimpysmom (1:12:49 AM): and they say, “issues are dumb. you should get rid of them right now….i'm keepin' mine though.”
Joelandrewtyson (1:13:07 AM): ?
Joelandrewtyson (1:13:11 AM): weird
whimpysmom (1:13:25 AM): that was the gist of the conversation
whimpysmom (1:13:37 AM): interspersed with, “oh my god, would you shut up?”
Joelandrewtyson (1:13:43 AM): haha
Joelandrewtyson (1:14:13 AM): what issues was she talking about… if you want to tell.
whimpysmom (1:14:26 AM): my short temper
whimpysmom (1:14:30 AM): my insecurity
whimpysmom (1:14:48 AM): and i guess the long ass time it takes me to get rid of them
Joelandrewtyson (1:14:52 AM): why was she briningthem up now??
whimpysmom (1:15:18 AM): well, kingston was all wired and not trying to go to sleep tonight
whimpysmom (1:15:47 AM): so tom and i were just goofing off with him for awhile, watching movies and stuff. but i figured that it was high time that he went to bed
whimpysmom (1:16:00 AM): i took him into his room where he proceeded to get mightily cranky.
whimpysmom (1:16:13 AM): which i expected and i was handling
whimpysmom (1:16:39 AM): my mom however comes to the door and starts cooing, “what's wrong?” i said, “oh, he's fine, don't worry. he's just overtired.”
whimpysmom (1:16:56 AM): she insisted on taking him from me and putting him to sleep since he obviously wasn't happy with me
Joelandrewtyson (1:17:08 AM): oooo my
whimpysmom (1:17:09 AM): i got offended and said, “i really hate it when you don't listen to me.”
Joelandrewtyson (1:17:12 AM): that's a no no
Joelandrewtyson (1:17:18 AM): thats way out of line
whimpysmom (1:17:19 AM): that's what i said.
Joelandrewtyson (1:17:23 AM): maybe offering once
whimpysmom (1:17:24 AM): my kid. i handle it.
Joelandrewtyson (1:17:30 AM): but insisting?
Joelandrewtyson (1:17:43 AM): angela would have ripped her head off
whimpysmom (1:17:52 AM): i understand that he loves her and all but it really upsets me when she does that
whimpysmom (1:18:06 AM): and she knows that it does, but it's just another one of my “issues”
whimpysmom (1:18:14 AM): according to her, i should be grateful
Joelandrewtyson (1:18:19 AM): that's not an “issue”
Joelandrewtyson (1:18:25 AM): That's total bullshit.
whimpysmom (1:18:30 AM): and i am….when i've asked for her help
Joelandrewtyson (1:18:36 AM): She needs to back the fuck off.
whimpysmom (1:18:40 AM): that's what i said
Joelandrewtyson (1:18:41 AM): =]
Joelandrewtyson (1:18:51 AM): In the nicest way possible…
Joelandrewtyson (1:18:52 AM): heh
Joelandrewtyson (1:18:59 AM): But seriously, that's bs.
Joelandrewtyson (1:19:12 AM): She's taking advantage of the situation.
whimpysmom (1:19:19 AM): but she said something like, “so you would rather your son cry and be upset than be with someone he loves just for YOUR own reasons?”
whimpysmom (1:19:34 AM): like, turning it around on ME and my selfish mothering tendencies.
Joelandrewtyson (1:19:48 AM): No, that's not selfish mothering.
Joelandrewtyson (1:20:02 AM): ITS MOTHERING – You're his mother. Jesus.
whimpysmom (1:20:05 AM): i know!
whimpysmom (1:20:23 AM): so i just had to blow off some steam so i came down here to get my mind off of it.
Joelandrewtyson (1:20:43 AM): That's not an insecurity issue or whatever, that's a boundary issue. And it's hers.
whimpysmom (1:20:45 AM): usually if i feel a “discussion” coming up i have to do that or else i just scream and flip out and look like an idiot
Joelandrewtyson (1:21:20 AM): Man… it's tough.
Joelandrewtyson (1:21:40 AM): You know you're right, but you know they (parents) have little chance of changing for the better.
whimpysmom (1:21:43 AM): so she came down to see if the lights were out and discovered me on here. then she started to get into it, and kept interrupting me….and i screamed and flipped out and looked like an idiot
Joelandrewtyson (1:21:54 AM): =]
Joelandrewtyson (1:22:40 AM): Does she do that often?
whimpysmom (1:22:40 AM): and i'm just crying and saying, “i KNOW that i have issues that i've brought on myself and i'm sorry that i was a shit to you upstairs but you need to just LISTEN TO ME.”
whimpysmom (1:22:58 AM): do what?
Joelandrewtyson (1:23:32 AM): The whole, you know “you have issues” thing.
Joelandrewtyson (1:23:53 AM): Therefore I don't actually have to listen to what youhave to say.
whimpysmom (1:24:18 AM): well, she often accuses me of not having respect for her, which isn't the case. i just have a very short temper and my mouth tends to get ahead of me.
whimpysmom (1:24:29 AM): i try to reign it in but it doesn't always work
Joelandrewtyson (1:25:01 AM): Well… I'm sorry.
whimpysmom (1:25:04 AM): then i just look like i'm having a temper tantrum
Joelandrewtyson (1:25:11 AM): heehee
whimpysmom (1:25:12 AM): and, really, who wants to listen to that?
Joelandrewtyson (1:25:18 AM): right
Joelandrewtyson (1:25:35 AM): well… i think people do listen …. eventually
Joelandrewtyson (1:25:44 AM): but parents are the worst to get through to
whimpysmom (1:25:51 AM): it's not disrespect as much as it is me just being a tad nuts
Joelandrewtyson (1:26:23 AM): well… it's more having to do with you trying to express yourself as an adult
whimpysmom (1:26:33 AM): yeah, definitely.
Joelandrewtyson (1:27:01 AM): and if she doesnt respond to that… you have little else to do
whimpysmom (1:27:08 AM): but she's always been so overprotective of me…which has obviously backfired
whimpysmom (1:27:20 AM): she's never just stood back and let me fuck up
whimpysmom (1:27:31 AM): because she's always wanted to be “supportive”
Joelandrewtyson (1:27:35 AM): right
whimpysmom (1:27:54 AM): but it just pisses me off because she thinks that i'm trying to say that i'm unhappy. and i'm not. i'm actually quite happy.
Joelandrewtyson (1:28:20 AM): yeah… i get into that with my mom too.
whimpysmom (1:28:24 AM): i have a great relationship. i have an adorable baby. i don't worry about where my next meal is going to come from or where i'm going to sleep.
whimpysmom (1:28:40 AM): my basic needs and desires as a human being are met. i'm happy.
Joelandrewtyson (1:28:41 AM): like the whole, you aren't fullfiled and thats why you act that way…
whimpysmom (1:28:47 AM): yeah
Joelandrewtyson (1:28:54 AM): i feel like saying “no, it's just YOU!”
whimpysmom (1:29:06 AM): i get very frustrated by some of my friends who are constantly depressed
Joelandrewtyson (1:29:12 AM): “everyone else I interact with treats me like an adult.”
whimpysmom (1:29:20 AM): i understand having chemical imbalances. i had postpartum
Joelandrewtyson (1:29:31 AM): yeah
Joelandrewtyson (1:29:38 AM): that stuff is weird.
Joelandrewtyson (1:29:53 AM): i mean… i'm essentially depressed i guess… or just lazy
Joelandrewtyson (1:30:09 AM): i donno… but like zach is really really depressed…
Joelandrewtyson (1:30:14 AM): its frustrating
whimpysmom (1:30:30 AM): but, i don't worry about getting blown up every other day like people in other parts of the world do. i don't scrounge for scraps in a garbage heap to feed my malnourished children
whimpysmom (1:30:40 AM): those people have a right to feel depressed
Joelandrewtyson (1:30:49 AM): very true
whimpysmom (1:30:58 AM): white kids living in america need to quit it
Joelandrewtyson (1:31:08 AM): ha ha
The rest of the conversation was about how depression has become a marketing tool and working out titles for my DJ megamix CD.