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Greeting card causes rift in family

Good lord. Sometimes my mother is fine and east to get along with. Sometimes she is slightly irritating. Other times she just fucking picks on me and I just want to pinch her in the arm (notice that I said “pinch” not “punch”). The day before yesterday, the baby and I walked up to Hallmark to buy cards for my mom, whose birthday is tomorrow, and my grandfather, whose birthday is on Sunday. I bought them both a card from the baby and a card from the boyfriend and me. Last night my mom told me to sign my grandfather's cards and that she would mail them tomorrow when she got to work. I signed the card from the baby and the card from the boyfriend and I, then left it out for the boyfriend to sign when he got home. A little while later, my mom came up to my room and asked me, panicked, “Kelly, did you buy Pap a card from you?”
“Yes, of course, I did.”
“Well, where is it?”
“I left it on the counter for the boyfriend to sign.”

My mom then rolled her eyes and began lecturing me like I was a little kid.
“NO! You have to send him a GRANDFATHER card that's JUST FROM YOU!”
“Why? I sent him from the boyfriend and me.”
“That's just not enough.”
And so on and so on…
I can understand the gesture, although my grandfather really wouldn't have cared (he's seriously one of the most laidback people I've ever met). Anyway, I told her that I would buy the card, and that of course meant that I had to buy her a Mother birthday card just from me.
This morning, I expressed some frustration at having to walk back to Hallmark and spend money on redundant greeting cards. The boyfriend said, “Yeah, since it has my name on it, it's like it doesn't count.” That made me feel pretty bad. I'm not sure what my family thinks of my relationship with the boyfriend. I really don't get the impression that they understand that the boyfriend is basically my husband. I can't help but get the feeling that they're waiting for me to ride out this “thing” with him and then find a “real” mate. My grandmother at times has even suggested places for me to meet men. It kills me. I mean, just think about it, why would I have a child with someone that I wasn't really serious about? Morons.
Anyway, the greeting card thing. My mom told me two or three times before I went to bed to get the card. This morning, I found a note that said, “Don't forget to buy and mail a card for Pap TODAY!” Then she called while I was in the shower and left a message on the answering machine that said, “Hey. Oh, you must be out buying and mailing a card for Pap.” Then she sent me an email this afternoon saying, “Say, did you mail that card for Pap?” I've ignored all of these helpful little reminders because it really pisses me off that she thinks I'm so incompetent and/or self-involved that I can't buy my own grandfather a card. (For the record, Hallmark had ONE grandfather card that wasn't juvenile, and it was one of those Mahogany cards. I'm probably going to get shit for that from my grandmother, who will point out that my grandfather isn't black. Fucking hell.)
The workers who have been doing the windows are finally getting ready to leave. This project took forever. Gah.

And…a survey that I stole from cause I liked it.

1. What's your middle name, and do you like it?
Bridget. I do like it. I was baptized when I was five and was allowed to choose my own middle name. I originally wanted “Baloney” but settled on Bridget because this pretty girl in my nursery school class was named Bridget.
2. What's your best memory from high school? College?
High school…I don't know. High school kind of sucked, but I do have some good dance-related memories. Although, graduating ranks pretty high up there. College…I met some good people during my time in college and had many interesting classes. I wish I wouldn't have fucked around during the first half of my sophomore year and messed up my grades, but I did have many good times. Graduation also ranks pretty high up there.
3. Is it more important to be proud of yourself, or make others proud of you?
It's a balance. If being proud of yourself were all that mattered, you'd run into that problem where people might say, “I'd be really proud of myself if I were the next Adolf Hitler, even if everyone else was pissed about it.” So, I guess the ultimate answer is to try to make as many people proud of you as you can and then die from exhaustion and futility. Word.
4. If health weren't a factor, what junk food, if any, would you pig out on?
Chocolate and/or cookie dough. Although, it's not the health that's worrying me so much as the nausea and eventual spewage. Does that fall under health, too?
5. What was the last movie that made you cry?
Lost in Translation. Well, it didn't make me cry so much as tear up in a good way, but not in a sappy way. Forget it, it's a good movie, just go see it.
6. Would you give up your life for your best friend?
Yes.
7. If you had to lose either sight or hearing, which would you choose?
Hearing. I could still feel the things that were important to hear. But I think I would die if I couldn't see my baby's sweet face.
8. Do you have a favorite work of art, and if so, what is it?
I'll join the dork squad with and say the baby. He's truly amazing.
9. What animal are you most afraid of?
Spiders. I'm fascinated by them, but they seriously creep the shit out of me.
10. Have you ever made someone feel bad to make yourself feel better?
Probably. I can be a real asshole sometimes.
11. What is the first thing you can remember wanting to be when you grew up?
A dancer.
12. What's the worst injury you've ever sustained?
Probaby a sprained ankle. I'm not very injury-prone. I have had some nasty surgeries, though.
13. Do you live in the past, the present, or the future?
The present, although I will admit that I dabble in the future a little more than I should.
14. Have you ever stolen anything? If so, were you caught?
mp3's I suppose.
15. What habit would you most like to change?
Picking at my lips. They really look like shit.
16. What's your dream car?
It doesn't exist yet, but I'm sure it will soon: a hybrid VW Jetta or Passat wagon.
17. Are family gatherings an obligation or a pleasure?
Obligation. However, I usually have an alright time once I'm there.
18. How long have you and your best friend(s) known each other?
I've known Stacey for almost ten years. I met the boyfriend about 9 years ago but have only really known him for four years. The rest of my friends are in the process of being recategorized.
19. If you were to be cremated after death, where would you want your ashes scattered?
I liked 's idea:

“I have actually researched being turned into fireworks. Turn me into a big fucking red commie star and launch that motherfucker over the Pentagon or something. ”
20. What quality is most important in a potential mate?
At a very basic level, intelligence, humor, and the ability to help me put things in perspective.
21. Does the future scare you or excite you?
Excites me. I really think that the baby, the boyfriend, and I are going to blow shit up, one way or another. ;-p
22. How old were you when you had your first real kiss?
It's fuzzy. I got a kiss from Josh Sprajcar, the love of junior high, when I was 12 during a game of Seven Minutes in Heaven. However, I could tell that he was really not into it. My first romantic kiss was with Billy Manzietti when I was 13 at my best friend, Annie's birthday party. (Billy was Annie's cousin. He was 16!) Then my first with-tongue kiss was when I was about 14 with this kid who I used to dance with. His name was Kenny Wang and he was from Taiwan. He was also a total asshole, but it's amazing how a lack of English will make a person blind to that.
23. Do you believe in reincarnation?
Not officially, no.
24. Is there a TV show you never miss?
Pretty much anything that HBO spits out: Sex and the City, Six Feet Under, Carnivale, The Wire. I've also seen every single episode of Roseanne.
25. What's your favorite time of day?
Whenever I get to spend time with the boyfriend and the baby just loving each other.
26. What's worse, being injured or being ill?
Being ill, because it sometimes seems like you'll never get better.
27. What accomplishment or achievement are you most proud of?
My son, although it's not like my parenting will ever be done, you know?
28. Dogs or cats?
Dogs, or as the baby calls them, “Gogs.”
29. Have you ever been mad enough to lose control?
Yeah, but not psychotic, kill everyone mad. Screaming, foaming at the mouth mad.
30. What's your favorite mode of travel?
Planes are alright, trains are not as fun as I would have thought, car trips are cool. It all depends how long and who you're going with really.
31. Are you a good tipper?
Yes, always.
32. What would be the worst job in the world for you?
Tanning booth tester.
33. Name three things you would put in a time capsule that would best identify you to future civilizations.
A picture of my little family, a print-out of my LJ, lip balm
36. Favorite quote from a movie or song?
Probably any line from “Isn't She Lovely?” by Stevie Wonder. I was thinking about that song last night and just how fantastic it is. Plus, lovely is one of my favorite adjectives to describe a child or a woman.

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