I’m trying to be all healthy and active and whatnot

I Read A Lot of Internets

might as well reminisce

Two years ago today, I was most likely finishing up my paper for Film Analysis. My son was busy turning back into the breech position and no doubt thinking, “She'd look better with a big horizontal scar on her lower abdomen. The vertical stretch marks are just kind of boring. Eventually, I'd like to be able to play tic-tac-toe on my mom's belly.”\
Then some part of my body undoubtedly swelled and I most likely farted.

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