I’m trying to be all healthy and active and whatnot

I Read A Lot of Internets

I prefer the term, “topographically challenged.” Thanks.

So, I’ve been pretty busy the past couple of days. I had some orientation events and some house stuff to tend to, plus classes started yesterday. That’s traditionally pretty crazy for me, work-wise, but it’s even more so now. I am now officially a graduate student and had the first meetings of both of my classes yesterday and today. They seem alright but I don’t yet feel like I have a clear sense of what we’re going to be doing which makes me dread the semester a little. Reading over the syllabi, some words were familiar, like “assignments,” “15-20 page paper,” and “ugh.” But I felt not unlike this chick:

The U.S. Americans…don’t have maps with such as…the Iraq…and we in the U.S. should help South Africa Americans find a map with the U.S. on it. And world peace, too.

I keep telling myself that she was just so nervous and completely lost her shit because I know I get flustered and insert words and verbal clutter when I’m nervous. But I’m worried that Miss South Carolina just had no idea what Aimee Teegarden was talking about. And did she not know that she was going to be in a pageant and therefore did not have time to prepare? Whatever. I’m sure she’s mortified. Too bad.

The baby starts kindergarten on September 6th, not August 30th like we originally thought. But this week we go to some events to meet his teachers and on Friday we take him in for some placement testing. I’m so ridiculously excited (and weepy) for him to start. But I’m taking the extra time to work myself into what will be our new routine. I’ve been packing my lunch at night and last night, for the first time ever, I used the automatic brew function on my coffee maker. I have class at 9 on Tuesdays and Thursdays so I can’t go to my office first to grab a cup. Besides, the office coffee kind of sucks.

I’m also training myself to wake up earlier and I find that when I know that I have to get up earlier my impulse to keep sleeping isn’t as strong. So I managed to drag myself up and out of bed at 6:20ish this morning and squeezed in a half hour of yoga. I’m taking advantage of our new DVR feature on cable and taping the cheesy Namaste Yoga series from FitTV. The cat came and did some form of kitty yoga with me, lying down when I did then standing up and meowing. He did kind of ruin my mini meditation by attacking my hair and he totally showed me up during the cat stretch, but I enjoyed the company.

Also, since I was already going through big changes in my tiny life, I signed up for Weight Watchers again and have a buddy in Tracey. I appreciate having her to sound off with since she’s nice and cynical and is willing to hear my rants about body image and societal pressures and whatnot. The last time I really did Weight Watchers I went to the meetings and was just kind of creeped out. Our meeting leader kept saying stuff like “Nothing tastes as good as being thin feels,” and I would be like, “Obviously, you’ve never had creme brulee. I’m pretty sure that comes close.”

Anyway, I know I probably sound like I’m drinking the diet Kool-Aid (aka Crystal Light Fruit Punch, motherfuckers), but I’m not myself. I haven’t felt this crappy in a long time…probably since December 2001 when I was a jillion months pregnant. And it’s not like when I’m not dieting my weight is the furthest thing from my mind. I think about it constantly and have been since I was little. I don’t really know if that’s going to ever change. So while I’m thinking about it, I might as well take some steps to be healthier, right? This past year or so has just been really rough and I guess I abused myself in some non-fatal ways…like with Fiery Habanero Doritos.

7 comments to I prefer the term, “topographically challenged.” Thanks.

  • I’ve been on WW for like 6 months now and it’s working and all but I’m not a bundle of joy about it. I only do the online stuff because if someone said out loud to me, “Nothing tastes as good as being thin feels” I would kick her in the Fiery Habaneros. “Obviously, you’ve never had creme brulee.” is MUCH more like it! Or chocolate lava cake or a really well baked cookie. Sigh.

    But I didn’t feel like myself, either, and now I feel closer to feeling like her, a lot closer so I guess it’s OK.

  • I saw that vid on youtube, and a response was posted to it that defended her brilliantly…

    “some of us Americans can’t afford maps.. now i’m sure some of you white-collar-map-havers out there might not get it, but Ms Upton’s empathy for the poor is commendable”

    now that’s some funny shit… “white collar map havers”

  • They just played the audio of that kid on Air America. Aloud, I said, “What the fuck did she just say?” and Randi Rhodes came on and said, “What the hell did she just say?” The population is embarrassing, as usual.

    Sounds like you’re starting a good routine, should feel “normal” in about I month or so, which will be good. I knew things would work out well!

    (Sorry about my rant last time. It was exactly the wrong time for me.)


  • Good luck with Weight Watchers. The meetings would have stressed me out because I can’t be in a room with a bunch of strangers talking about feelings without a glass of wine, some chips and guacamole, and lord knows how many points that would cost me. I hope you feel normal again, soon.

  • Good luck with grad school! What are you going for? I did my Master’s right after I got the Bachelor’s in Creative Writing, because I couldn’t get a job. Grad school was interesting and it really flew by. I envy the ability to do morning excercise, I am a total waste of space that early in the morning. A coworker of mine lost about 90 pounds on WW with the online program. It does work. With all that you are accomplishing, I’m sure you’ll feel a little better soon.

  • Kizz, totally feel you on that.

    Goose: bwah!

    WD: It’s cool about the rant. You know I love you no matter what.

    Tamara: Thanks for the well wishes. Ditto on needing the wine to discuss feelings. Meetings are counterproductive in that way.

    Harper: Thanks! I’m going for Professional Writing. I am not a morning exerciser (or an any-other-time-of-day exerciser, really) but I have to start getting up early now anyways so I figured I’d see how the other half (read: the motivated and mature) live.

  • JZMom

    Sorry I’m late to the conversation here…but…Did you see that Miss Teen South Carolina was on the Today Show and had a second chance? Here’s what she said:

    “Personally, my friends and I, we know exactly where the United States is on a map. I don’t know anyone else who doesn’t. If the statistics are correct, I believe there should be more emphasis on geography in our education so people will learn how to read maps better.”

    OMG…is that really that better a response????

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