I’m trying to be all healthy and active and whatnot

I Read A Lot of Internets

or my name isn’t

Someone left a box of that new Orville Redenbacher’s Naturals popcorn here. I just tried some of the Buttery Salt and Cracked Pepper variety. It’s pretty good, even if most of the pepper sticks to the inside of the bag.

Which reminds me of reason #65 why my hair is awesome (in that sarcastic sense): when I eat stuff like popcorn or anything that can produce light crumbs, that stuff sometimes falls in my hair, where I fail to notice it. And I will blissfully walk around with half of my lunch in my hair like some crazy slob. Usually nobody points this out to me and I can’t really blame them. I mean, who wants to have a conversation that starts out, “Um, did you mean to put ham in your hair?” which is a statement only a short hop away from, “Are you aware that you just shit your pants?”

Also good: the new Erykah Badu album.

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