bits, pieces, what have you

I noticed a little bit ago that I have a gigantic grease stain on my pants that I’ve had a total of three months. I now remember that I got the stain because of my poorly handled treatment after an unfortunate egg roll incident about a week ago. I put very little effort into my appearance as it is, and if I continue along this path, I will be in sweatpants and Tweetie Bird tshirts by summer.

I’m taking the bus into work this week, which takes me into downtown. I haven’t been downtown in the mornings in quite some time and had forgotten how wild it can be. Yesterday, I was hit on by a very forward but nice construction worker who told me that, were he and I to have a baby, we could name it Butterscotch. I then found myself in the midst of a fight between two women and man, all of whom seemed to be in the depths of some kind of substance dependency. Woman 1 had insisted to Woman 2 that cigarettes cost $5.50, but Woman 2 soon found out that cigarettes actually cost $5.57 and when the fuck was Woman 1 going to pay her back that 7 cents? And, you know, money’s money. My only beef was that they were SO LOUD at 8:30 in the morning. And finally, a man rode by on a motorcycle blasting some song about Jesus.

This all happened within about 10 minutes.

The husband and I went to see Margaret Cho last Saturday. She was awesome, of course, though she’s started to incorporate some songs into her act that I’m kind of “meh” about. I’ve never really gotten into my body issue stuff on here because, frankly, I get sick of thinking about it since it’s been a constant neurosis of mine since I was about six years old. But whether or not I have ever fit into any traditional molds of beauty (and honestly fuck those) her words on the matter echo through my head all the time:

“I am so beautiful, sometimes people weep when they see me. And it has nothing to do with what I look like really, it is just that I gave myself the power to say that I am beautiful, and if I could do that, maybe there is hope for them too. And the great divide between the beautiful and the ugly will cease to be. Because we are all what we choose.”

Also, after the show I finally got a goddamned Shamrock Shake and it was sooooo good.

6 Responses to “bits, pieces, what have you”

  1. Jacquie Says:

    Holy shit, cigarettes are so expensive! They used to cost like $2.00. I know I sound like an old lady when I say crap like that, but it really does blow my mind. I wonder how my existential musings would have affected the argument between those two downtown broads. Broads. There I go again. I swear I’m not a senior citizen.

  2. kdiddy Says:

    @Jacquie, apparently we get them pretty cheap here. I’m glad I quit smoking some years back. I’d be even broker than I am now!

  3. Frank Says:

    Kelly said: Yesterday, I was hit on by a very forward but nice construction worker who told me that, were he and I to have a baby, we could name it Butterscotch.

    I think it shows you still have it.

  4. kdiddy Says:

    @Frank, word!

  5. Black Hockey Jesus Says:

    This made me think a lot because I thought you had the grease stain for 3 months, but then you had the eggroll last week, so I had to circle back around to discover that you had the pants for 3 months and the stain for a week.

  6. kdiddy Says:

    @Black Hockey Jesus, indeed. Those are some bad adverbial complements. Please accept some Aleve.

Leave a Reply