Wedgie-worthy thought #1, while folded over in yoga class: “Squee! My toenail polish matches my yoga mat EXACTLY!”
Wedgie-worthy thought #2, while thinking about meals and groceries for the next few days: “Dammit, I’m out of quinoa.”
Wedgie-worthy thought #3, that I actually uttered out loud yesterday in the car: “I find lately that I’m only comfortable writing prose. Is that pretentious?”
Regarding the first two wedgies, in between episodes of morose navel-gazing, I’ve been working on my health a lot. I’ve become addicted to so-called “healthy living” blogs. I’ve been exercising at least a couple of times a week since March. And I think I’ve reached some sort of peace with food, which is a huge deal.
You’ll notice that a bulk of the links in the left sidebar are for food blogs. This tells you several things about me: that I like to cook and bake, and that food takes up a good portion of my thoughts and energy. This used to manifest itself in a number of bad ways. “Did I eat too much? Did that have too much fat in it? Should I just not eat at all today and tomorrow? To hell with it, I’m just going to eat everything in sight.”
It’s Eating Disorders 101 that people with food/body image issues who feel out of control of their lives tend to focus their control-freak energy on their bodies and this often has disastrous results. It has for me in the past. But this feels…healthier. For the first time that I can remember, I want to be healthy, not just skinny. I’m discovering a lot of joy in eating things that are good for me and it makes my occasional indulgences that much more enjoyable and way less guilt-inducing.
Some of the blogs that I’ve found really inspiring are fANNEtastic food, Kath Eats Real Food, (never home)maker, The Front Burner, and the edible perspective. Clicking on the blog rolls of any of those will take you down a rabbit hole of other, similarly awesome blogs, so check those out when you have a few hours that you can dedicate to reading (and drooling).
Inspired by these bloggers, I’ve been eating oatmeal nearly every day for breakfast for a few months and I’ve got to say that it’s been one of the best things I’ve done for myself. (never home)maker got me hooked on these Chai-Spiced Autumn Oats. I tweaked that formula a little by skipping the apple and peanut butter and replacing them with a banana. Eye-rollingly delicious. edible perspective has me making my own Maple-Roasted Cinnamon Almond Butter, which I put on my oatmeal in the morning. Unfortunately, my last batch didn’t turn out well. I used my smaller food processor which just wasn’t up for the job and ended up with a crumbly paste instead of a butter. Still tasty, though. I just have to be careful about making it when the baby is around since he’s allergic. And The Front Burner has me excited about making my own protein powder mix. I’m still assembling the ingredients, which are a somewhat heavy upfront investment. She also has a fantastic tofu tutorial.
All of those bloggers are also runners, which is also really inspiring to me. Also on my left sidebar, you’ll see my Daily Mile widget that shows what activity I’ve done that day. Yesterday, I got to show off my 3.42 mile run, which is the farthest that I’ve ever run (though there are some quick walking breaks in there, but I don’t claim to be a marathoner), and there’s usually a yoga class sprinkled in there.
I can’t make the economy better. I can’t make someone hire my totally awesome husband, who worked really hard to become an electrical engineer and is so bummed that he can’t break into that industry. I can’t wish away our student debt or our terrible kitchen. But I can take care of myself so that I’m better able to take care of my boys. So that’s what I’ll do.