I do need to take a shower
But before I do, I must tell a quick story. My grandmother, compulsive shopper that she is, went to some going-out-of-business sale at some strange tchotchke shop in Oakmont. She bought me some zen tchotchke that's essentially this rather attractive dark wood box with chimes and beads in it. You turn it over, the beads fall on the chimes very slowly, occasionally releasing a “dooooooooooooooonnnnnnnnnnngggggggggg” (actually it's more like a “tiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnggggggggg”) sound that is supposed to be soothing. Last night I snuggled into bed, rather exhausted and fretting over a paper that's due tonight. I had *just* drifted off and was whipping up a dream when I heard “tiiiiiiiiinnnggggg.” I think I pulled muscles in my eyelids from opening them so quickly. Due to my state of sleep I could not think of what could be making that noise. But I can remember the possibilities that ran through my mind. The first was that it was a kitchen timer and that something was done baking. The second was that it was the Grim Reaper. Yeah, apparently in my mind the Grim Reaper sounds a little chime when he's come to collect your soul. The third was that there was someone in my room, some sort of intruder. Again, announcing their arrival with a chime? I realized what it was after a few seconds but that didn't stop me from having a few heart attacks when it chimed two more times during the night. Consequently, I'm exhausted. Fuck zen. It scares the shit out of me.
