Mark the date, kiddies.
Wednesday, August 13th, 9 a.m. at the New Kensington Driver's License Center.
Kelly Delaney will make her second attempt at attaining her driver's license. It will be a perilous journey, frought with parallel parking obstacles, disgruntled DMV employees, and nerves frazzled beyond repair as Kelly Delaney, Old Hag Who Can't Drive, braves the road in her mother's trusty Honda Civic.
Kelly's previous attempt ended in heartbreaking failure. After suffering a massive brain fart and forgetting how to turn on the headlights, she was instructed to go to the parallel parking section of the test. Kelly had parked marvelously well in her lesson the previous week, but she was not sure how well she would perform under pressure. She soon found out. As she pulled up to the yellow markers her heart started beating extraordinarly fast. The proctor, his polyester pants pulled tightly against his expanding beer belly, stared over the rims of his glasses and sighed. A series of sloppy reverses, bumps, and cuss words later, Kelly was finished. The test lasted a little under five minutes. Despite her determination to remain graceful under pressure, Kelly burst into tears in the middle of center and went “waaahhhh!” all the way home.
Tune in to see the exciting conclusion…
