kdiddy.org

I watched Nightmare on Elm Street last night. That ruled. First grade just came rushing back to me. The Godfather was on a little later (not on the same channel). It started really late and I didn't have any intention of watching as much as I did but I couldn't help it. Now I'm really in the mood for some cannoli. mmmm…

You know what I really love? I love it when the boyfriend reads the newspaper and then touches everything in the house. The living room looks like a friggin' crime scene. There's black fingerprints on the phone. I'm not amused.

Oh my…it's been a few days since I've properly updated and I feel like there's so much I have to tell all of you. I guess some big news is that my mom is buying a new car. The Chevy Caprice/Titanic has wheezed her last breath and my mom has decided to trade it in. I'm going to miss that old clunker a little bit. It's got a touch of class. She's getting a Honda Civic which I'm pretty glad about. It'll be nice and manageable and I should have no problem taking my driving test on it.

My driving test. I was trying to do some kind of meditation on that last night. Visualizing myself parallel parking nice and smooth and driving without screwing up and all that. I don't have my retake scheduled but I'm going to have to do it soon. My permit expires in a month!

Onto the funny stories that I promised. Tuesday night we went to Kelly's and we were having a rather nice evening. As I mentioned before, I met which was neat. He is the first Live Journalist that I have met who I didn't already know…if that makes any sense. You're tall, man.
Anyway, there was a group of people sitting caddy corner across from us and it became evident before too long that they were going to be awarded the “Most Obnoxious/Can't Hold Their Liquor” award. Obviously, they were drunk which in and of itself isn't really offensive. Kelly's is, after all, a bar and the effects of alcoholic beverages is to be expected. But this was a Tuesday, not traditionally a day of celebration. These people were also well into their twenties so I think that it's safe to assume that they had drank before that night. They were total amateurs…mixing all kinds of shit and making fools of themselves. One guy in particular was being a total ass. He kept standing up and yelling nonsense to rest of the clientele, then would sit down and shove his tongue down his girlfriend's throat. She had apparently taken a valium or two before coming to Kelly's because she was kind of out of it. The Total Ass would then reach across the table and pretend-scuffle with his friend, yelling and swearing the whole time. Very annoying. After awhile the inevitable occurred…a glass fell off the table and broke prompting many dirty looks from the staff and the people sitting near them. They settled down for a few minutes but were soon back to their antics. Another glass went flying off of the table, broke sending shards of glass and alcohol flying. No one was hurt but Jim and I both got a healthy dose of alcohol on our legs. Jim, who is normally rather sedate, spun around and yelled, “What the fuck is your problem? You've been acting up all night! Fucking grow up!” Total Ass, predictably, mustered up all of his 120 lbs and got in Jim's face, asking him what he was going to do about it. Obviously, Jim's friends far outnumbered Total Ass', as he soon found out. Akil to the rescue…he and several other cronies asked Total Ass what exactly he was planning to do. In his smartest move of the evening, Total Ass sat down and sulked for a few minutes. Showing that he was truly a class act, he left, forcing his girlfriend to pay the bill. Taste.
After everyone settled down from that incident, things seemed like they were going to be rather calm for the rest of the evening. Not so. This guy Alex, who I guess is something of a regular, had left after sharing several uneventful drinks with two male friends. Suddenly, Alex comes walking back in, goes over to where his friends are still sitting and starts to strangle one of them. And not in a, “Oh, you're such a goofy guy, here's an affectionate strangle,” kind of way. He was actually trying to kill this guy. The staff and a few patrons rushed over saying, “Alex, knock it off, what are you doing?” Alex gave up pretty quick and rushed out to the door to everyone's refrains of “Have another one, Alex.” Alex's victim seemed unphased and after shaking his head in disbelief for a few minutes, returned to his cocktail and conversation. As we were leaving we asked Meg what the deal was with Alex's attack and she had not even been aware of it, even though she had been sitting a few feet away the whole time. We asked Alex's victim what had happened and he just looked at us like we were crazy. Having had our fill of psychotic shenanigans, we left. White people are crazy.

Gushy mom portion: The baby picked up his book of shapes this morning, opened to the circle page, pointed and said, “Circle!” like he had been saying it all of his life. He's such a goofball.

Housework calls.

I've been running around like chicken with its head cut off. In other words, I'm a tad busy. Doing what, you ask? I honestly don't know because as of this moment, nothing is fully written, the house is a mess, a pile of winter clothes are sitting in the corner of my bedroom and will probably stay there until November, and my son is passed out on the kitchen table.

I have a few funny stories to tell but can't get to them now because I have to continue with my decapitated fowl routine.

Highlights: I met last night. That was neat.
White people are crazy.
Girls are crazier.
Something's wrong with my toe.

I was feeling lame. Stole this from

Name: Kelly
Piercings: Ears, nose (awaiting new stud), navel (on permanent hiatus)
Tattoos: right hip, left side of my lower back.
Hair Color: red, mostly
Length: chin length

PAST.
First Grade Teacher's Name: Mrs. Barr, until she went on maternity leave. The sub's name was Mrs. Aker.
Last Word You Said: nap
Last Thing You Laughed At: the baby struggling not to fall asleep while he played with toys.
Last Time You Cried: hmm…well, I can't seem to remember so it's been at least a couple of days. That's good, I suppose.

LAST.
Last Book You Read: The last one I finished was “Keeping Women and Children Last” by Ruth Sidel. I'm currently reading “Fast Food Nation” by Eric Schlosser.
Last Movie You Saw: 28 Days Later
Last Movie You Saw On the Big Screen: 28 Days Later
Last Show You Watched on T.V.: I fell asleep while the TV was on last night so I can't really remember. I think the boyfriend was watching VH1 Soul.
Last Song You Heard: The first track on Brian Eno's Music for Airports.
Last Thing You had to Drink: Caffeine Free Diet Coke (barf)
Last Thing You Ate: an apple
Last Time You Showered: this morning
Last Time You Smiled: about an hour ago while I watched the baby struggle with sleep.
Last Time You Laughed: Whoever wrote this survey needs an editor.
Last Person You Hugged: the baby
Last Person You Talked to Online: Meat
Last Person You Called: my mom
Last Person That Called You: a telemarketer
Last Person You Talked to On the Phone: Seriously, you really need an editor.
Last CD You Bought: I think it was Common's last album…I was disappointed.
Last CD You Listened To: Maxwell “Urban Hang Suite.”

DO YOU…
Smoke: not anymore
Do Drugs: Nope. I can probably count the number of times that I've smoked pot, I dabbled in the e-pills but soon grew to hate them, and I've never cared to try anything else.
Drink: Every once in awhile, but I generally don't drink to get drunk anymore. I'm a born-again lightweight.
Sleep With Stuffed Animals: yes! Bun-bun and the boyfriend.
Have a Crush: yes
Have a Dream that Keeps Coming Back: I don't think so…at least, not enough to make me wonder about it.
Play an Instrument: Used to play the flute but I sucked at it.
Read the Newspaper: Yes, although not so much on a daily basis. I at least glance at it everyday but sometimes I just don't get the chance to sit down and read it.
Have Gay and Lesbian Friends: Yes, but I've fallen out of touch with the ones that I was really close to. 🙁
Believe in Miracles: Not Loaves and Fishes or anything really religious. I'm amazed by something every day. If you want to call it a miracle, go ahead.
Consider Yourself Tolerant: Tolerant of people different from me? Generally. I'm not too tolerant toward assholes.
Consider Police a Friend or Foe: I'm definitely wary of most police. Whether I would group them all as foes, I don't know.
Like the Taste of Alcohol: Some of it.
Believe in Magic: No, not really.
Pray: Not in the traditional sense…see, we're getting into a weird area. My religious arrangement is not really easy to explain. It's very casual. I talk to someone at times. Whether that someone is God or a god I don't really care to define.
Go to Church: No, although I do like the way old churches smell.
Have any Secrets: One or two but nothing diabolical. Just stuff I've never told anyone.
Have any Pets: No. Moment of silence please for Dog the Lizard, Murphy, Paddy and Kermit the Hermit…
Go to or Plan to Attend College: Graduated…ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Hate Yourself: Sometimes.
Wish on Stars: No
Like Your Handwriting: No, it's rather messy and doesn't really have any distinguishing characteristics.
Believe in Witches: Not folklore witches.
Believe in Ghosts: I get easily creeped but I don't think that neccessarily means that I believe in ghosts.
Believe in Santa: No
Believe in the Easter Bunny: No
Believe in the Tooth Fairy: No
Have a Second Family: I guess so. The boyfriend and his family are now technically related to me through the baby.
Trust Others Easily: Not really.
Sing in the Shower: Sometimes, but I get frustrated when I don't know all of the words.
Believe in Online Dating: I probably wouldn't ever use an online dating service or any dating service…not because I'm just that hot, because I just don't care that much. However, I've met my last two boyfriends and a number of close friends via the Internet so I guess you could say it's served me well.
Wish You Could Live Somewhere Else: Sometimes…Well, a different house? Yeah, I want to buy my own house. A different city? Sometimes, but then someone starts talking shit on Pittsburgh and I get all defensive and think, “I could live here forever.”

Think About Suicide: I have, several times, but not to any serious point.
Like Cleaning: I like a clean house…I don't like having to do the work to get it so.
Like Roller Coasters: Indeed.
Write in Cursive or Print: Print more often.
Carry a Donor Card: No, but I'm identified as one on my ID.

FASHION…
How Many Coats and Jackets Do You Own: I've accumulated quite a few over the years and through my various sizes.
Do You Wear a Watch: Yes.
Favorite Pants Color: Jeans…blue…
Most Expensive Item of Clothing: I honestly don't know.
Most Treasured: New underwear, bras that fit.

FOR OR AGAINST…
Long Distance Relationships: I don't like participating in them. I don't really see how this is an institution I could be against, though. What am I going to do, protest?
Using Someone: Depends on the situation.
Killing People: Not for sport, no.
Smoking: I've become more militant since I've quit smoking and since I had my son. Bottom line, I would really really like to go out one night and not come home with cancer and stinky clothing. Also, I think tobacco companies are really fucked up and supporting them any further is just absurd to me.
Doing Drugs: I find drug enthusiasts to be highly irritating, although I don't think I would try to deprive them of their hobby. Drug addicts need help. Let's put it this way, I would not want my son to become either a drug addict or an enthusiast. Casual experimentation I don't think I would have a problem with.
Premarital Sex: This isn't really an issue with me. I would not want to marry someone who I hadn't had sex with but plenty of people do just that and are very happy. So, whatever.
Driving Drunk: That's fucking stupid.
Gay/Lesbian Relationships: Wherever the love is, man.
Soap Operas: *shudder*.

FUTURE…
what is your career going to be: It changes every day.
where are you going to live: Most likely Pittsburgh
how many kids do you want: Probably just the one. I wouldn't be vehemently opposed to two but I just don't know if I would want to do it.
what kind of car will you drive: A Honda Civic Hybrid. I've always like Volkswagens, though.

CURRENT…
current clothes: Blue tank top, blue jeans, tube socks.
current annoyance: That I haven't written reviews for winter mittens yet. Sorry!
current smell: plastic toys warming in the late afternoon sunset.
current longing: some food and some sex.
current desktop picture: Akil as a young one.
current favorite music artist: Don't have one.
current worry: Career/money.
current hate: Politics
current favorite article of clothing: my bra that fits.
story behind your username: The boyfriend started calling me that around the time that Puff Daddy became Pdiddy.
i am happiest when: the baby, the boyfriend and I are having a group hug.
i feel lonely when: the boyfriend goes to sleep too soon.
do you think too much: Sometimes.
famous person you have met: Pete Seeger
do you have any regrets: Just a few minor ones.
sex or love: Uh
favorite coffee: Vanilla cappucino
favorite smell: my son's breath when he wakes up from a nap.
favorite way to waste time: writing
are in currently in love/lust: with the boyfriend.
any bad habits: picking my lips.
do you find it hard to trust people: Get an editor.
last thing you bought yourself: don't know.
bath or shower: shower
favorite season: spring
favorite color: blue
favorite time of day: right when I can finally get into bed with the boyfriend.
gold or silver: silver…ideally platinum.

Last night I finished my son's bath and pre-bed routine at 8:50 p.m. Sex and the City starts at 9. I tried to get him to go to bed quickly but he would have none of it. So, I took him into my room and let him watch a TV show about sex with me.

*waits for CYS to come knocking*

Just got a phone call from the guy at the Post-Gazette…

I am writing for them! Wee!

The phone conversation was pretty funny. I picked up the phone and heard, “Hi, this is Brian from the Post-Gazette–” then the boyfriend groggily picked up the other phone, “Hellooo?” Awkward moment of silence. I whispered to the boyfriend, “I got it!” then started breaking out into a drenching sweat. The guy from the PG giggled and then started telling me what the deal was. The baby, of course, chose that moment to attempt death-defying stunts on his toys and the living room furniture, turning the obnoxious musical toys on all at once and pitching a fit. I heard little of what the PG guy said. I'm telling you, Boyz N the Hood. Boyz N the Hood.

On an unrelated note, we saw 28 Days Later yesterday. I liked it…and the baby just got hurt.
sigh
more later

I cracked my knee on the front door rather forcefully (no, not the knee that I cracked on my desk a couple of days ago, the other knee…call me Gimpy). I mentioned it to over ICQ a few minutes ago and he replied:
FJG: owchies
FJG: *kisses you all over the knee*
Me: wow, thanks
FJG: ooh! you are not cara! ()
That always happens. I have no game.

Anyway, I need to make a declaration. I declare the phrase “le sigh” officially overused. I know that many of you, my friends, continue to use it. I know that I have used it in the past but I think it's time for all of us to move on. This seems to be a phenomenon restricted to Live Journal so that's good.

I had Pilates this morning at PBT. Their summer program started this week and it reeks of dancer feet in that building. barf.

I'm about to pass out.

Oh, am I tired! This weekend is the Greek Food & Wine Festival out in Oakmont. Too much good food. Last night moderation was key but tonight I'm trying to get my bacchanalia on…wine, gyros, loukemades, baklava…I'm fucking waddling out of there tonight, mark my words.
Last night was a bit of a pain since I had the baby's huge Evenflo stroller with me and there were about 6,000 heavily pregnant women sitting around me. I had to keep asking them to get up so that I could move his huge stroller. I eventually just gave up and started carrying him around with me. Today my back is very sore. I tried to let him run around with the other kids but I think he's too small for that yet. I say that because about ten seconds after I put him down he got tackled by a 5-year-old. He was stunned but the tackler was very polite…helped him up, kept asking him if he was okay (he's 18 months old, sweetie, he probably won't answer you), apologizing. I had to giggle. Luckily, the baby didn't seem too offended.
Last night the boyfriend fell asleep pretty early and I stayed up to watch the new version of The Time Machine. It made little sense but it was fun to think about the English language still existing 780,000 years from now and humans not evolving one stitch. After that I flipped around and there was some Radiohead performance on MTV2. I could only stay up for half of it but was highly amused at Thom Yorke's antics as he tried to “pump up the crowd.” MTV's perception of quality filmmaking is also quite amusing. They did these very dramatically slow closeups of Thom's fingers as they gnarled with the emotion of “Idioteque” and the way he frantically shivered his tambourine. What tools. Anyway, I'm a little bummed that there's no way I will be able to go see them when they stop in Cleveland this year. Sigh.
I awoke this morning to really loud construction. Ergh.
I have to go get ready for Pilates. yip.

Well, yesterday was a good day. My mom had the day off and we went out to Oakmont. She to visit the dentist, me and the baby to visit the grandparents. When the baby was little all day visits weren't as tiring. Now they're kind of a pain. My son is pretty well-behaved, I think, but he's still a toddler. And my grandmother, of course, has all kinds of breakable, valuable stuff just lying around her house. I literally followed him around in circles for three hours saying, “Nononononono…stop…don't touch that…” When my mom's dentist appointment was over we went to Oakmont Yacht Club for dinner. That place is such a joke. It's like the community college of private clubs. I mean, I really don't have very high standards for restaurants and even I was starting to get a little annoyed. I think it mostly had to do with the baby getting really sick of having to sit in one place. But, no matter. When I got home three cool things happened right in a row. First, I checked the mailbox and I had received a bunch of CDs from and . After making my way through the Fort Knox layers of scotch tape I got to squeal in glee at the promos. Always exciting. Then I checked my email and found that I had received two important messages. One was from the fellow at the Post-Gazette who said, “I looked over your resume and writing samples and would like to talk to you
about the article you are proposing. Please call me at your convenience.” Sounds promising, right? I called him this morning but he's not there. Left a message. Hopefully, I'll get to actually talk to him today instead of playing phone tag. The other email that I got was from a gal I know who works at dvdempire.com. She's heading up a new section of the website geared specifically toward women and I queried her about doing some writing. She sent me the guidelines and it looks like it will be a very interesting endeavor.
So there you go. Three writing opportunities in one day. Not too shabby, eh?

After all of that excitement the boyfriend and I put the baby to bed, ate some ice cream and settled in bed. We watched the usual dating shows and then flipped around the channels for a bit. We ended up watching this David Lynch movie Wild at Heart. It was Lynch-errific. I wouldn't say it was the best Lynch flick I had ever seen but it was pretty good. Very…graphic. Lots of blood and…brains. Diane Ladd's character drove me absolutely insane. Seriously, I started to feel wretched every time she came on the screen. Also, I don't know how I feel about Nicolas Cage or Laura Dern in general. Anyway, I'm sure there are at least 50 hack interpretations of the hidden meanings in Wild at Heart on imdb.com.

I didn't get nearly enough sleep last night. I'm getting too old for that.

Oh yeah. One more good thing that happened yesterday: STROM THURMOND FINALLY KICKED THE BUCKET! I wonder if Trent Lott will get to do the eulogy. Hmmm…

No, it's not just a clever title. I actually have nothing to say. I wish the baby would take a nap. ugh.

The baby is playing my favorite game:
How Many Different Ways Can I Get Injured?
aka
How Fast Can We Get to the Emergency Room?