kdiddy.org

I'm trying to be very quiet and still because I want the baby to sleep a little longer. He was acting kind of sick last night (slight fever, chills, crankiness, wouldn't let me finish building my Lincoln Log ranch), so now I'm thinking that every extra minute of sleep will be beneficial. He did get a flu shot but with the little ones they only give them a partial dose. In a month, I'm supposed to call his doctor and, if there is any vaccine left (which is looking less and less likely by the day), send him in for the second dose. The boyfriend assured me that the flash of illness was probably just his immune system working with the vaccine, but I couldn't help but worry. When my kid gets sick, he gets really sick and I just can't deal with it. I'm so thankful that he doesn't have any serious illnesses. I would have to be sedated the whole time.\
Anyway, enough of that talk.\
I went to bed earlyish last night, as I've been doing this whole week. I'm trying to work the kinks out of my schedule so that I don't feel so ineffectual all the time. In addition to waking up early so that I can get things done before the baby wakes up, I'm thinking I'll also start showering at night. My hair doesn't get too psychotic if I stay up long enough to let it dry. You should see it when I just go to bed with it wet. Bride of Frankenstein, my friends…Bride of Frankenstein.\
However, with the exception of today, the baby's been waking up increasingly early, rendering my early arousals pointless. Work with me, baby! In any case, I haven't had to get too much done this week since Pulp seems to hate me and didn't give me any writing assignments. :-(\
Oh yeah, I was talking about last night…\
The boyfriend came home from taking his calculus final (I can't even type the words without getting a chill) and was rather giddy since I guess it went well. We did bedtime with the baby and then he went back out to do goofy shit with friends of ours. He said, “I'll be back in about an hour,” which, in Boyfriendese means, “I'll be back in about four hours.” I watched The Crow, listened for any hurlage or other distress from the baby's room, chatted with about sick babies and capitalism, and worked on the mix CD that I've been making for for about four months now. It's shaping up to be a bit of an anthology, as I've finished one disc and I believe there will be two more discs before all is said and done. I've finally said, “To hell with finding the perfect sequence,” and resigned myself to sending off a rather schizophrenic set of CDs that switches genres faster than Madonna. I do have a confession to make. I'm new to the whole CD making process and have fucked up several times now. I won't go into details but I know have at least two CD-Rs with big, blue Sharpie X's drawn over them containing only a Bill Withers song or two and a quote from Spaceballs. But I'm determined to finish this anthology and send it off with a holiday greeting…killing two birds with one stone.\
Anyway, as predicted, the boyfriend came home several hours later. There was miscellaneous groping and many nonsensical statements about hot dogs on my part since I was fast asleep and dreaming about Eddie Izzard when this all happened.\
On a side note, those of you looking for good birth control and are okay with taking hormones, I have to give my full endorsement to Ortho Evra, or The Patch. It seriously fucking rules and it's good for people who tend to forget things on a day-to-day basis (read: the Pill…BAD).\
Alright, this entry's been random enough, methinks, and I'm starting to get a coffee headache. I also hear some stirring coming from the baby's room. Let's hope I am greeted by a healthy toddler!

My mom and I are both, supposedly, protected from the flu.\
My arm is very sore and I think it's spreading to my back. Ow.\
The baby had his 2-year checkup yesterday which went quite well. He actually grew and gained some weight this time around, which means he's now on the charts. Before he was in like the -5 height and weight percentile for his age. He's still napping, the boyfriend's studying for a final, and I'm shuffling around, sort of doing laundry, but mostly wasting time on here.\
grog.

This is more of a funny instance than the rather upsetting racism instance, but yeah…\
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Quote of the day:\
“i am seriously jonesing for some old school hip hop/rap!! kriss kross, mc hammer, vanilla ice, etc.!”\
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If you're my son's age, I guess that could be considered “old school,” but…ugh…christ.

But first, a quiz that's actually funny. Quit groaning, I hate quizzes, too. But I couldn't pass this one up after seeing it in 's journal.\
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You are a Grassroots Activist. Anti-capitalist,
anti-patrist, anti-authoritarian, whatever,
you're just fuckin' anti. You probably tell
people you hate postmodernism, but that
assertion elides the complex interdependencies
among academic poststructuralism and street-
level activism. You don't bathe regularly, and
know at least one person who has scabbies.\
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What kind of postmodernist are you!?
brought to you by Quizilla\
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That's funny, because if I saw that guy at a protest…well, first of all, I don't go to protests, secondly I'd kick his skinny chest in…actually I'd just snicker behind his back about how his antics make the rest of us look bad…or something. I'm the anti of the anti. Word.\
Edit: I'm also anti-spelling-very-simple-fucking-words-incorrectly. What the fuck is wrong with all of the people who create quizzes at Quizilla? Sadly, the not bathing regularly part is true, but it's not my fault. On that note, I'll just say that being able to take a shower at some point this week would be the bomb.

I'm going to go get a flu shot…or, as the baby likes to say, “Mama get a boo shot.”\
Yeah, that.

I have this friend who I think may become an ex-friend very shortly. He and I were very close for many years and used to have so much fun together. In fact, he was my first semi-serious boyfriend in high school. Last year, he went through some shit (breakup, loss of shitty job, shitty unemployment, new shittier job, financial troubles, had to move back in with the 'rents, etc…you know, crap that has a tendency to pile up on people all at once). He really was having a hard time handling all of it and I tried as hard as I could to be the best friend that I could be. I tried tough love, being kind and supportive, offering to go with him to fun places, offering to talk, offering advice, whatever I could think of. Nothing helped and he has been depressed for almost two years. One of my best friends, someone I used to talk to almost every day, will no longer answer my emails nor will he pick up the phone when I call. I guess it's obvious that he doesn't want me involved in his life anymore, but it hurts me to think that. I wish that I could just slap some sense into him. Argh.\
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whimpysmom (4:49:01 PM): hello\
ex-friend? (4:49:27 PM): How are you doin'? \
whimpysmom (4:49:37 PM): good how are you?\
ex-friend? (4:49:47 PM): meh..\
whimpysmom (4:52:32 PM): meh?\
ex-friend? (4:52:56 PM): It kind of feels like it sounds…just kind of there. or here in my case. \
whimpysmom (4:53:11 PM): right\
whimpysmom (4:55:52 PM): jonah told me that you're working at a new place?\
ex-friend? (5:02:07 PM): I'm not working anywhere right now. \
whimpysmom (5:02:29 PM): oh he said that your temp agency had sent you someplace new\
ex-friend? (5:03:06 PM): No, not yet. I was working at the culinary institute, but they haven't found anything yet that I want. \
whimpysmom (5:03:13 PM): i see\
ex-friend? (5:03:21 PM): They offered me a couple of telemarketing jobs that were seven days a week. \
ex-friend? (5:03:32 PM): I'm already depressed enough, I don't need that too. \
whimpysmom (5:04:01 PM): no, telemarketing is no fun\
ex-friend? (5:04:58 PM): Have you done it before? \
whimpysmom (5:05:33 PM): no, but i know that i would hate it. jess was a telemarketer for a few years and said that the money was okay but the rest of it was ass\
ex-friend? (5:06:06 PM): I can imagine so…people getting angry with you, hanging up on yout, etc…\
ex-friend? (5:06:27 PM): it was at the culinary institute again and paid less, so I told them where to shove it. \
whimpysmom (5:06:49 PM): yeah, plus you get fired if you don't reach a certain sales goal\
ex-friend? (5:07:04 PM): yech.., fuck that. \
whimpysmom (5:07:40 PM): i mean, i guess in most jobs if you're not “performing” well you get fired but in telemarketing it seems like it would really be your fault, you know?\
ex-friend? (5:08:09 PM): I don't think it would really be my fault. \
ex-friend? (5:08:12 PM): in that job. \
ex-friend? (5:08:17 PM): people just don't like getting called. \
whimpysmom (5:08:22 PM): that's what i meant\
whimpysmom (5:08:23 PM): oops\
whimpysmom (5:08:36 PM): most people just don't even let you get your pitch in\
ex-friend? (5:08:45 PM): oh, good, then it's settled. No telemarketing. \
ex-friend? (5:09:05 PM): People also talk about the things they do to telemarketers as well. \
ex-friend? (5:09:13 PM): lay the phone down and walk away, etc. \
whimpysmom (5:09:15 PM): yeah, i hate that\
ex-friend? (5:09:35 PM): scream, play really aggravating music, just generally fuck with you. \
whimpysmom (5:09:56 PM): thing is, with welfare reform and people getting kicked off of assistance for any low-paying job that they can get, a lot of the people who are telemarketers are people who are just trying not to get totally fucked\
whimpysmom (5:10:21 PM): i mean, i never buy anything from them, but i'm never rude\
ex-friend? (5:10:37 PM): I'ts one of those jobs that people don't take unless they are really at the end of their rope. \
whimpysmom (5:10:51 PM): yeah, exactly\
ex-friend? (5:10:57 PM): I ask them to take my number off the list, and then hang up. \
ex-friend? (5:11:21 PM): although I havent' gotten any since the do not call registry. \
whimpysmom (5:14:50 PM): so i missed you on saturday. i thought maybe you might stop by\
ex-friend? (5:15:50 PM): for what? \
whimpysmom (5:16:00 PM): are you still on the hamm list?\
ex-friend? (5:16:18 PM): Yeah, but I don't read the email anymore. \
whimpysmom (5:16:26 PM): oh\
ex-friend? (5:17:03 PM): what happened? \
whimpysmom (5:17:29 PM): i invited everyone over for cake and stuff\
whimpysmom (5:17:34 PM): kingston's birthday\
ex-friend? (5:17:54 PM): Oh, I knew that was coming up…I wish you would have called. \
whimpysmom (5:18:13 PM): well, you never answer your phone when i call so i figured the hamm list was a safe bet\
ex-friend? (5:18:16 PM): I didn't do anything on saturday, I've kind of dropped off of the face of the earth for all intents and purposes. \
ex-friend? (5:18:40 PM): I'm just really bad at life right now. \
ex-friend? (5:19:01 PM): I'm going to run down to the mailbox…I might be back. \
ex-friend? signed off at 5:19:11 PM.

The baby's birthday yesterday was quite fun. My family got here around 1:30 and then rest of my friends trickled in later on in the afternoon. The baby got so much cool stuff. I'm trying to get my energy up so that I can go through his older toys and sort out what he's too old for now. However, I'm a little drowsy and would really like to curl up on the couch and doze.\
My grandparents and cousins left pretty early yesterday buy my friends stayed well into the night. For quite awhile it was just us and the baby sitting in the living room playing with toys. As I looked around, I thought, “My kid is so lucky to be growing up around such interesting folks. All of these goofy twentysomething people, at various stages in their professions, talking about movies, discussing the virtues of Sit N Spin, and playing with Lincoln Logs.” I mean, think about when he goes to school. The boyfriend said that he's going to be so confused the first time that he goes over a friend's house and will probably say something like, “Where are all of your records? Isn't your dad a DJ?” That's why more of my friends need to have kids. Mine needs an ally in weirdness. \
The LJ vibe was strong at the 2nd Year Shindig. , , , , and were all there and all brought excellent presents. My lasagnas, by the way, were a huge hit. If I do say so myself, they turned out really yummy. Even the diet-friendly one was damn good. The baby had a lot of fun flirting with all of the girls and playing with all of his new stuff. He didn't take a nap all day, though. So around 6 p.m. he was looking really out of it. He passed right out when I started rocking him, but I took a moment to just hold him and admire him sleeping like I did that night two years ago. Just him and me, in the dark, loving each other. Perfection.\
I pulled out the photo album from when he was born and kept looking through it and thinking, “How can this teeny-tiny person be my little boy?” I want to scan some of them, especially the ones of me immediately post-op. I'm so out of it. You can tell. I'm just lying there, holding this stuffed bunny that I've had since I was about a year old, with my finger in my mouth, half-smiling. It would make a great user icon.\
Anyway, enough mom mushiness. I think I need a beverage.\
I went to bed really early. I think I read about a page and a half of my book and then just passed out.

It might be the espresso kicking in, but I'm in a super-good mood today.\
However, I seem to have developed severe psoriasis on my hands and arthritis in my knuckles. Poo.\
Gotta shower.

I don't know what the deal is with my image hosting site or if the problem is with me. Anyway, here's a link to the picture that I was referring to. Shutterfly will have to do.\
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http://www.shutterfly.com/osi.jsp?i=67b0de21b35967c0c4e3&notag=1