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Bedtime with the crib tent did not go as well as the naptime with the crib tent…not by a LONG SHOT. I felt very, very helpless. He would act all flipped out and scared when I would put him in the crib and zip up the tent. However, I was worried that if I took it off he would climb out and wander the house while I'm asleep. I could take the tent down put a gate up at the door to his room, but he can climb over that, too….at least I think he could if he really wanted to. I can't bring him into bed with me because he just won't do that. He'll sit still for a minute but then he either gets out of bed or starts flipping out and crying.\
The boyfriend and I went into his room with him and told him how cool his tent was and how we wished that we had one, too. We put him in there and sat next to him for awhile and talked with him and his animals. He seemed okay with everything, but when we left he got really upset. I didn't know what to do. He ended up crying for about five minutes before falling asleep. I hate doing that to him, but I really felt like I was at my wit's end. He's such a good baby so when he has these moments of irrationality I just don't know how to deal with it. Luckily, my mother wasn't here. Whenever the boyfriend and I are trying to work through some parenting challenge my mom has a way of screwing it up. Last night he was being weird about who he wanted to put him to bed. I would rock him for a little bit but he would cry for his dad. His dad would rock him back and forth and then he would cry for me. We would both try to put him to bed and he would cry for our next-door neighbor, which just wasn't an option. Eventually, the boyfriend decided to be the one to put him to bed. The baby, of course, cried about this. My mom thinks that anytime he's crying means that something is very very wrong when it was obvious to us that he was just being a toddler and was tired and cranky and didn't know what he wanted. My mom basically accused me of child abuse and I told her not to EVER use that word in reference to me again unless she really meant it. Sometimes I don't think that she believes in us as parents and that really upsets me. It also really bothers me when she gets home from work and acts all exasperated with the baby like she's been dealing with him all day and I haven't. The other night she snapped at him for some little thing. I said to her, “Mom, please don't snap at him.” She then said to me, “I DIDN'T SNAP AT HIM.” It'd be nice if I could deal with an adult every now and then.\
I'm also getting really frustrated with my short-order cook status. Practically every meal I have to make two or three different things to please everyone and it's driving me crazy. What a spoiled bunch. Of course, I guess I bring this on myself with my insistence that everyone eat somewhat healthily. Otherwise, they could all just make crap for themselves. Why exactly am I so concerned with keeping these people healthy?\
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…\
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This entry hasn't been much fun, has it? Sorry, just had to get some crap off of my chest. I really need to clean the bathroom. The boyfriend is at Club Havana and my mom is at her friend Nora's. Would cleaning the bathroom by myself at midnight on a Friday night be horribly pathetic?\
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…\
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I'm really craving sweet stuff this week. It's getting on my nerves.

So, due to the baby's latest feat, we went to Babyland today and bought him a crib tent. I was a tad concerned that he would hate it, but he's pretty cool with it. He was very excited when I was assembling it and putting it on his crib. Now, he's napping peacefully and I'm in a much better mood than I was yesterday. I'm actually a little jealous of the tent, as it has that mosquito net quality and I've always kind of wanted one of those for my room.\
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Our digital cable was upgraded to include On Demand yesterday. On Demand is basically a scaled-down version of TiVo and so far I really like it. I was able to watch, pause, rewind and fast forward some old episodes of Six Feet Under. They have a video channel, so last night we watched some old Bauhaus and KMFDM videos and felt goth. It ruled.\
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Durrr…my train of thought derailed. Damn apple dip.

1) I left my cell phone in my coat pocket yesterday. Shanley called me twice. I felt bad. I'm a horrible cell phone owner\
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2) I went outside with the baby to take some pictures. I closed the front door so that it would be just screen door ugliness in the background of the pictures. I didn't remember until after I had closed the door that the doorknob was locked. I had locked us out of the house. Luckily, the boyfriend was home from school about 45 minutes later and it wasn't very chilly outside. Otherwise, my afternoon (and the baby's afternoon) would have sucked a whole lot more.\
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3) During naptime, I was in my room, and the baby was in his crib, supposedly sleeping. I heard him chatting with his animals, but decided to leave him there in the hopes that he would drift back off to sleep. Next thing I know, I hear little footsteps scurrying down the hall. The baby had finally figured out how to climb out of his crib. I'm not sure what this means for naptime now. I'm a little concerned.\
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I have a headache.

It's a little chilly, but there isn't a cloud in the sky and the sun is nice and bright. Today I'm hoping to dress the baby in something slightly festive and take pictures of him sitting in front of the house. I'm getting wallet picture pressure as his second birthday creeps up. The general concensus seems to be that I need to take him to Target or JC Penney and get his picture taken at their portrait studios, but I just can't bring myself to do it. Besides, are they saying that my photographic skills aren't good enough for them? I take offense. \
Uhhh…I had other stuff to tell you but I'm feeling a little too hyper to sit at the computer right now.

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Naptime's creeping up. Then it's….Laundry Time! Woo! death.

This weather is bumming me out. I want to take a walk. I wouldn't mind it so much if it were just all-out storming, but this drizzling crappy stuff just gets on my nerves. Wah.\
I hope that I get more rebate checks in the mail today. That would rule.

stolen from \
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1. WHAT IS YOUR Middle name?\
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Bridget\
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2. WHAT kind of PANTS ARE YOU WEARING\
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Black cargo pants with fuzz all over them.\
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3. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?\
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Whir of the computer, clickety-clack of the keyboard\
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4. WHAT ARE THE LAST 4 DIGITS OF YOUR PHONE NUMBER?\
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3271\
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5. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE:\
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A mint Hershey's Kiss\
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6. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?\
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Same as :\
Red-Orange, or is it Orange-Red?????\
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7. HOW IS THE WEATHER RIGHT NOW?\
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Slightly chilly, grey, a little windy\
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8. LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?\
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The boyfriend\
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9. THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX?\
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Lately, facial hair\
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10. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT YOU (from whom you stole) THIS?\
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Indeed, I do, although I must admit that I don't her very well in any capacity. I just get a good feeling about her. ;-)\
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11. HOW ARE YOU TODAY?\
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Okay. Better than I was yesterday.\
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12. FAVORITE DRINK?\
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Right now, any flavor of Fruition flavored water from Giant Eagle.\
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13. FAVORITE ALCOHOLIC DRINK?\
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Champagne or Cosmopolitan, although I'm thinking of trying something new for the holidays. I will have to consult about that.\
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14. FAVORITE SPORTS?\
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None, really. Sports don't bother me but there's always something that I would rather be doing when watching them…at least on TV. Actually attending a sporting event (basketball, baseball) is pretty fun.\
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15. HAIR COLOR?\
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Red and brown\
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16. EYE COLOR?\
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Blue\
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17. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?\
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Yes. Ow.\
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18. SIBLINGS AND THEIR AGES?\
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None.\
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19. FAVORITE MONTH?\
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I like all of them for different reasons, but the ones that stick out the most are June, October, and December.\
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20. FAVORITE FOOD?\
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All of it. Although I've never been able to turn down a really big plate of pasta with sauce and garlic bread.\
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21. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?\
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The Good Girl. I didn't actually see all of it, I missed the beginning. I'd like to see it again, though.\
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22. FAVORITE DAY OF THE YEAR?\
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Halloween is always pretty good, partly because it's my birthday. However, Dec. 6 and Mother's Day are creeping up, too.\
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23. ARE YOU TOO SHY TO ASK SOMEONE OUT?\
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Not really. But it's not an issue for me anymore.\
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24. DO YOU LIKE SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?\
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Both.\
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25. SUMMER OR WINTER?\
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Both.\
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26. HUGS OR KISSES?\
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Both.\
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28. CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA?\
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Chocolate.\
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29. DO YOU WANT YOUR FRIENDS TO WRITE BACK?\
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Back to what? This? I don't care.\
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30. WHO IS MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND?\
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I don't know.\
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31. WHO IS LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND?\
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I don't know.\
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32. WHAT BOOKS ARE YOU READING?\
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Choke by Chuck Palahniuk.\
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33. WHAT'S ON YOUR SCREEN SAVER?\
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On the Dell it's just a Windows XP doodie. On the laptop, it's some dorky Carnivale scene.\
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34. FAVORITE BOARD GAME?\
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Scrabble.\
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35. WHAT DID YOU DO LAST NIGHT?\
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Tooled on computer, watched The Good Girl, checked the Steelers score, put the baby to bed.\
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36. FAVORITE SMELLS?\
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Lilacs, roses, the ocean, clean laundry, babies (it's really a miracle to me that babies don't get eaten more often).\
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37. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THINK OF WHEN YOU WAKE UP IN THE MORNING?\
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Guh\
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38. WHERE WOULD YOU TRAVEL TO RIGHT NOW IF YOU COULD?\
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London. The boyfriend's little sister and dad are going there in January. I'm jealous. runner up: Europe in general or the Baltimore/D.C. area cause that's where all the cool kids are.

Upcoming Late-Night Movies:\
The House of Yes\
Edward Scissorhands\
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I could DIE

Last night, after finishing the interview, I wrote a few words of the article and realized that there was pretty much no hope of me finishing it before today. I set my work aside and went to sleep. This morning, I woke up kind of early and worked on it for about 45 minutes when I heard the baby calling me. I went into his room to find that he had dried, crusty blood covering his upper lip and streaked all over his pajamas and crib sheet. At some point during the night, he had a nosebleed. I don't know if he jabbed himself with one of his fingernails or if his nose just got too dry with the weather and all. So after that shock first thing in the morning, I had some usual morning annoyances: baby not wanting to eat, blahblahblah. After “breakfast” we went into the living room and I tried to convince the baby to play by himself while I finished writing my article. Sure enough, he had his morning, um, “movement” and needed to be changed. I took him upstairs and when I came back down the boyfriend was getting ready to leave for the day. An argument ensued. They subject of the argument really isn't important, because it was very dumb. Basically, the boyfriend was pissed at my mother for something trivial and taking it out on me. I reminded him that I was not my mother and that any beef that he had with her should be dealed with her directly, instead of yelling at me in front of our toddler. Well, I was called some choice names which nearly sent me into a blind fury. He left. I called my mom to tell her that the boyfriend was pissed at her but that I had graciously endured his wrath. She bitched at me for something totally unrelated. On top of all of this, I still had to finish my article. As soon as I sat down at the computer, I started bawling. I was hurt and irritated that whatever crap was bothering them had been turned into my problem. Not only that, I was still responsible for laundry and cleaning the house for all of us. Just then, my dad called. He had off of work today and wanted to see if I wanted to have lunch. I couldn't help but spill my guts to him. He sympathized, which was nice. After I got off of the phone with him I was still crying pretty hard. My son asked me, “Sad?” I nodded yes, and he crawled up into my lap and gave me a hug. Then he took my tissue, wiped the tears from my eyes, put his head on my chest and said, “Mom, it's a beautiful day.” I could have died. I said to him, “Every day with you is a beautiful day,” and hugged him until he almost broke. \
I can't believe how lucky I am to have him and I can't believe how sweet he is.\
I'm still very irritated with my mother and my boyfriend and I'm generally beyond sick of my living situation. The most frustrating thing is that, at the moment, I can't seem to do anything about anything in my life. I feel like I'm just waiting for someone to say, “Okay, now you can go about living.” And that's a shitty attitude to have. I don't know. Lots of pressure from nearly every facet of my life right now and I can feel myself starting to crack. Tomorrow I'll feel better, but for right now it's doom and gloom and a very strong craving for something chocolate.

Shitty Mondays are such a cliche. I wish Monday as an institution would grow some balls and be different once in awhile.